My Hunger Strike is Over

I love you, Mommy.

Phew. Thank goodness it only took two days for Mom to wake up to the fact that the latest kibble she bought is AWFUL!

I have acquired a rather unusual eating routine, but one that I've become particularly fond of over the years. Daddy feeds me breakfast between 3:30 and 4:00 AM---believe it or not, HIS choice, not mine....and exactly 12 hours later, I'm bugging Mommy for dinner. She makes me wait until 4 PM. Daddy feeds me the kibble. Mom gives me the good stuff. And until this week, all was good with this arrangement.

As you might well imagine, I'm a gobbler, not a grazer, so it became pretty clear when there was still kibble in my bowl midmorning, something was off. DUH. NO I'M NOT SICK.

I positioned myself right under my cookie jar in the kitchen, with my particularly pitiful look that means I'm starving to death and need a treat. (Treats in this household are not given out generously. I only get 8 or 10 or 12 a day. I could easily empty the whole cookie jar in one sitting.) The look was good for one treat, but when I refused to budge, Mommy yanked the bowl full of yucky kibble under my nose. I turned my back on her and that stuff she was trying to pass off as my breakfast. Nope. Not going there. Then she had the nerve to lecture me. I was not going to get a Dogster. (Didn't ask for one...I get that as dessert after dinner.) She said I couldn't have more cookies. That I had a bowl full of perfectly good food. (Oh, yeah? Then YOU eat it, Mommy.) I took Giggle into the other room and pouted.

Dinner time FINALLY came--it seemed like 6 years since I had had real food. Mommy sprinkled the good food on top of the yucky kibble, so I had to carefully eat around all the rejects. I'm good at that. This talent runs in our family. When my 'sister' was little, she was able to stash peas in her cheeks, eat the rest of her dinner, eat dessert, drink a glass of milk, then spit out her peas! While I didn't personally witness this feat, I've heard stories. I pay attention. I learned from the best. I completed dinner, and the kibble was left in tact in the middle of the bowl. Success.

I am now getting 'the good stuff' at all my meals. This may mean I put on a couple pounds, but at my age I'm not auditioning for any beauty contests. But I am pretty darn beautiful, don't you think?